Tuesday, March 8, 2011

i wish i had an easy answer...

I have had a lot of questions voiced lately about how I have found a way to live in freedom. First of all, let me say that it is a daily struggle. I wish I could tell you that I live in 100% freedom 100% of the time. In heaven some day, we all will. But for now it continues to be a daily battle for me, and for all of us. I am a mess of a girl, a sinner, and continue to be, but so thankful to be forgiven and to be God’s mess.


And I wish it were as simple as providing a step by step process or checklist of the exact steps to follow to freedom. Trouble is, those steps are different for every individual. Just as not a single one of us has the same fingerprint, not a single one of us has the same soul, so the path to freedom will be very different for every one of us.


What I can tell you is that my path to the place I am currently involved 2 years of very intense weekly cognitive behavioral therapy with a very experienced Christian Counselor, a bible study of Beth Moore’s called “Breaking Free” through  my church, the support of family and friends, and many days and nights spent crying-writing-screaming-and weeping. Sounds like loads of fun doesn’t it, LOL!


I am not saying the process was easy, it was anything but easy. But…God sustained me and continues to sustain me. And was it worth it? Does it continue to be worth it? 100% absolutely yes!!!!!! Whatever your road to healing – it is essential that it includes daily time diving into His word, and daily time on your knees in prayer.


In the end I am confident that each and every one of us will look back over the journey, and not say “boy that was easy” but “boy that was worth it” and we will see God’s footprints with us every step of the way.


Here are a couple of books that helped greatly on my journey that you might want to consider:

Beth Moore: Breaking Free and Get out of that Pit

RT Kendall – How to forgive yourself, TOTALLY

Lysa Terkeurst – Becoming more than a good bible study girl

Devotional – Streams in the Desert



  1. beautiful Steph - I'm learning that it is in the pain and hard times that there is healing. It is never easy or pain free. Weird I know. Your words are so true. Keep sharing it! Don't ever quit...
    how is the job searching?

  2. Such beautiful words. It brings me joy to know you are walking your journey of healing. I love how God is with us even in the most painful times. Also, as I've seen happen so often, you are blessing others with the lessons you learned.

  3. Stephanie,
    I agree all paths to freedom of different. Your words are strong and impact many.

  4. I've done Breaking Free and it has helped me a lot! I think that you are exactly right that our paths may look different, but each one is so worth it.

  5. A church leader this weekend spoke to us about how we are all different and can all be given our very own personal commandments. And yet here I was questioning if the way I am overcoming is right. Thank you for reminding me that we all do it the way only we and God know how.

  6. When we are a mess we need the mess-iah! Love this... thanks for sharing!

  7. Oh, yes so with you...not been in the intensive counseling, but the reality of how it's moment to moment...no easy fix. Daily, hourly, secondly;) dependence...thanks for speaking it strong and hard! and here's to a life of victory and leading others in it...amen?!

  8. Always worth it! Love that! So thankful the Word is active and living and heals heals heals! Thanks for sharing these stellar ways that lead to healing... the Word, counseling, family/friends... Awesome!

  9. This is so true, I really believe that every experience that we find ourselves going through has a lesson and a gift attached....through our tests come the testimonies that will be a blessing for others who may go through a similar experience, we are learning every day, and as the word says renew our mind on the word. Thank you so much for sharing....xx

  10. Thanks Stephanie, I am trying to learn not to run from pain..