Wednesday, May 11, 2011

the nesting in the flux

Sometimes I feel as if I live in a constant state of flux between what I see and can’t see. Heavily involved in an ever present battle of the wills to consult my flesh or consult the Father. So many things are yet to be, and so many have come to pass, yet my heart remains anxious for what is to come.
Will it be what I wanted?
Will I want more?
Will the state of flux overwhelm me and will I tire of waiting, leading to a cold, distant, hardened heart?
One thing I never tire of is the knowledge that God is faithful. He has proved Himself to me time and time again.
Yet in the flux, I doubt.
The truth gets mangled somewhere in between my brain and my heart, and emotions and abandonment fears start building a nest. They hope to lay hatch-able eggs of hurry induced self reliance. Baby bird-lings that will eat up trust in Christ, and take flight on an undesirable path.
So I must chase off the abandonment fears, the raw, untried emotions, with biblical truth. Faith in the Father that trusts in the “I AM”-ness of Jesus. The flux may continue to press, but the only thing I pray the Lord allows to hatch is more faith and trust in Him.

Linking up to Word Women Wednesday today at


  1. Thank you so much. Great to read your heart.

  2. "hurry induced self-reliance" very well stated! When we choose not to wait for God's timing...that's exactly the outcome.

  3. I so agree... and I get caught consulting my flesh (mainly my emotions) way more than the truth God has to offer. <3

  4. boy..this among many other things lately has me deep in reflection and asking Him. I was just thinking..after Jen's post I really ask Him in all things. Small things? and I to am guilty of praying to really " see " and not faith. So I guess the opposite of faith is fear..maybe I live in fear more than I would like to think?

    Can you counsel! I'm really not kidding but I laughed when I typed it. I wrote the book down you mentioned .. have you read it?