Friday, May 21, 2010

Fell down

I fell down yesterday, not just like a little trip, I FELL DOWN!!! If I could compare it to when I was a little kid, I didn’t just fall and scrape my knee, I fell and busted that sucker wide open enough to need some stitches. And, no, I didn’t literally physically fall, but spiritually and emotionally, I took a nose dive straight for the pavement, and then rubbed my face around in the gravel for a few minutes.

It happened as I was cleaning out my office at work. I was already having one of those hormonal, emotional, nothing is going my way today, whiney, kind of days. So, I decided a good office cleaning might work off some negative energy. Only, as I did, I found some old journal writing, and a poem that I wrote, that is beautiful, but highly emotionally charged. And I read it, and there I went, spiraling down.

Old habits die hard, it is so easy for us to return to our comfortable ways of coping, no matter how unhealthy they may be, they are still all to easy to fall back into. They are familiar, and Satan uses that familiarity to lure you into the things you promised you would never do again, be it co-dependent patterns, a depressive state, an angry outburst, addiction, an eating disorder, whatever your poisonous pattern is, take your pick!

Then once we fall on the pavement into our icky pattern, Satan has us just where he wants us. Now…he can rub our face in the gravel…and he can get those rocks embedded into your forehead if you let him. He might even get some dirty rocks in, and then get you all infected with your own guilt over the fact that you fell down, and take you down even further. But…that is all a choice, we can fall and grovel around, or we can get mad, rebuke the enemy, and get back up!!!

So today, I am getting back up, and trying again. I have asked for forgiveness for falling back into my trap, and prayed that God will protect me while I heal. Today I am refusing to let Satan get any more of a foothold, I yanked that sucker back. Sometimes being defiant and headstrong is a good thing, LOL! And with that, I wanted to encourage all of you, that we all fall down, but how long we stay there is our own choice. Get back up girl!


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